Written by By Dr Cate Hearn

 

 

 

 

Shy or Self-Conscious

 

Compared to other children their own age, socially anxious children appear shyer and more self-conscious. They may:

 

 

  • Find it hard to talk to other children

 

  • Find it hard to make new friends

 

  • Feel left out or awkward, or worry they’ll embarrass themselves

 

  • Have less well developed social skills than children their own age

 

  • Dislike being the centre of attention

 

  • Worry a lot about their appearance

 

  • Worry that their friends don’t really like them

 

  • Be quiet in large social situations

 

  • Speak softly to those they don’t know well

 

 

 

Avoidance

 

Socially anxious children fear and avoid a range of social situations. They may:

 

  • Avoid new social situations

 

  • Make excuses not to go, by saying, “I’m just a homebody”, “I don’t feel like going”, “I don’t like parties”

 

  • Dread sports days or swimming carnivals

 

  • Dislike giving orals or talks in class

 

  • Be too anxious to raise their hand/answer questions in class

 

  • Play alone often

 

 

Tummy pains, headaches

 

Anxiety and worry can manifest in physical symptoms, and socially anxious children may:

 

  • Report pains in the stomach, headaches, nausea or sore/aching arms/legs especially before school or social events

 

  • Become withdrawn or irritable before social events or before school

 

 

 

Won’t they just grow out of it?

 

Research shows that a great many children with social anxiety do not just ‘grow out’ of it.

 

Left untreated, social anxiety can persist and cause significant interference in children’s lives. Child friendly cognitive behaviour therapy for social anxiety can help children overcome social anxiety.

 

At Benchmark Psychology, we have a number of therapists who can provide child friendly therapy to socially anxious children. Ask for Dr Cate Hearn (who’s PhD thesis was in child and adolescent social anxiety), Dr Alison Bocquee, Dr Kylee Forrest, Dr Jasmine Pang or Dr Leona Chun